Days of Our Lakers Lives

The Los Angeles Lakers.  Where to begin?


I thought long and hard about writing about the Lake Show but it sadly, always comes down to same conclusion.  There is NO point writing about this NBA team because it never stops and it wont stop.  The DRAMA, that is.  The Lakers managed to beat the Brooklyn Nets the other night without Howard and World Peace while proceeding to get slaughtered by the Boston Celtics WITH Dwight.  Ugh……Impressive.  Not nearly impressive enough.  It seems like the Lake Show is on a never-ending Gilligan’s Island Tour from hell.

Yes they have, and still are, stepped it up significantly considering their losses and close wins with teams they should be beating by more than 3 points.  All of the pressure and anxiety the Lakers must be feeling is forever mounting.  And you know why?  I think there are a few reasons why the Lakers are feeling like they are a soap opera of the NBA ages.

1. Chemistry


How shall I put this.  There is NONE.  Or there is but it has yet to unleash itself.  I guess Mark Cuban was right last summer, making the annoying point that you can’t slap an élite team together and expect them to win.  With all that talent, there should be some chemistry.  Right now it’s just in the stages of  ‘blow up the lab’ chemistry because my lab partner forgot to put in enough base in the beaker.  It seems that Dwight isn’t meshing well with the rest of the team seeing how Kobe is ‘calling him out’ every other week, advising him to forget the white LA noise and just play.  Easier said than done I guess for the big 6’11 man.

With all these talks of a looming Pau Gasol trade and Kobe getting frustrated, it is only making the chemistry of the team worse.  I really don’t think anything or anybody is really helping the team gain a sense of cohesiveness or unity.  It’s times like these when I miss D Fish the most…….

2. The Bench




3. Old Man River


Dude, the team is OLD. There are seriously no spring chickens on this team.  All of the veterans are solid but not all of them have access to the fountain of youth.  Nash is almost 40, Kobe is probably only going to play for two more years (AT MOST), Gasol is well past his prime, Dwight plays like he is 30….it’s just a sticky situation.  All of the veteran players are solid and can perform, but time isn’t on their side.  Jim Bush seriously needs to get with the program, get off his high horse in Beverly Hills and start drafting some high school players, STAT.

4. Injury


This comes with age.  The older the get, the more prone you are to get injured.  You body just isn’t what it used to be.  The Lakers have way to many injuries plaguing them each week.  Even if they don’t place themselves on the disabled list, KOBE, they play while hurt because they know the team is desperate.  I am a bit impressed with the number of injured players and the team’s ability to still play on a competitive level.  What is more astounding is when the starting lineup is present and manage to lose.  Wait, let me re-phrase that …..the Lakers don’t manage to lose, they just give up.

Utah Jazz v Los Angeles Lakers

5. Coach

Fool straight up doesn’t belong here and everybody knows it.  As long as Jim Buss is happy I guess we all have to be happy right?  Wouldn’t it be sweet if Mitch Kupchak just couldn’t take the bullshit anymore, decided to de-thrown Jim in a Battle Royal, and take over the Laker franchise, hire Phil Jackson, draft good players and give LA fans free tacos every night….Sweet.  Mitch is like 7 feet tall, he could totally take on Jim with only his right index finger.  Jim Buss sucks.


6. Los Angeles


I don’t know who to blame in this situation, Los Angeles or the Lakers.  For one, the Lakers have won several championships and produced some of the greatest basketball players of all time, thus giving Los Angeles a winning mentality.  On the other hand, Los Angeles is a selfish and demanding city when it comes to our sport franchises.  We want the best and we want to win, no excuses.  It’s a double-edged sword, it is a terrible masochistic relationship when the Lakers lose but it is a brilliantly loving relationship when the team wins.  We want our tacos dammit!

Laker Fans Riot

As of right now Los Angeles feels duped, swindled, tricked, straight up pawned by the Lakers head office.  Phil Jackson was dangled in front of the city’s very eyes and taken away before we could blink.  We snatched up some star quality players with the big signings of Steve Nash and Dwight Howard.  The unthinkable right?!  And now what are doing…..we aren’t just losing….we are really trying hard to lose.  It’s pathetic, its embarrassing, it sucks.  Wasn’t this team going to bring back our basketball dynasty?  So what are we going to do?

I have no idea.

Ladies and Gents, Meet the New Lakers…..again

The Los Angeles Lakers just can’t seem to make up their mind.  This last weekend was filled with indecision, drama and impatience.  The brilliant Jim Buss and company decided to hire Mike D’Antoni over…..DA DA DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Phil Jackson?! Cue the dramatic music, it’s been playing all week in LA.  With the hiring of Mike Brown last year I thought the Lakers were already starting anew……but not soo fast….we got another new coach in town….dang……that was fast.

Why is this such a big freaking deal? Oh wait, BECAUSE.  Los Angeles brought this upon themselves and no thanks to the never-ending nosey media.  This situation was completely blown out of proportion and has seemed to create such a stir in sports media, that this hot topic is the ONLY thing everybody has been talking about the last week.  What happened?  Did the NFL stop playing games?  Did College Football forfeit the rest of the season?  No wonder Jeff Gordon and his crew started a massive brawl in the pit, they felt that NASCAR was getting shafted by ESPN’s constant flow of Phil Jackson and Lakers updates, they needed to start something to get everyone else’s attention.  GO NASCAR.  ShooOOOooooot.

With such talent on the roster and a championship reputation to uphold…..or at least a championship LA can realistically dream about…it is no wonder the Lakers suddenly tossed Mike Brown to the curb and scrambled to find a new coach as quickly as possible.  Here is a thought, why didn’t you recruit a new coach before you fired the other one?  Isn’t that what a professional does?  Wouldn’t you think this whole mess and media attention could have been avoided?  Meh, probably not, this is LA, this is Kobe’s team.  A coach of a championship caliber team fired at the beginning of a dismal season…yea that is pretty newsworthy.  It could have just been done in a more professional and timely manner boys, come on now.  You just had to strategically plan and execute.  This isn’t rocket science, you can use some common sense here. 


Phil Jackson is old and retired.  He left a game a while ago, the game he happily left behind holding one of the greatest coaching reputations the game has ever seen, so obviously he would only return if the price was right.  A price he should be able to negotiate to favor his aging needs and brilliant mind, a price that would win Los Angeles a Championship they have been wanting for some time now.  Sadly, the men upstairs (VP Jim Buss, General Manger Mitch Kupchak, and the barley present President Jerry Buss) are trying to get their team under control but unfortunately under the relentless scrutiny and close watch of a city starving for a championship, a city that has very high expectations, so high that perhaps those expectations will never be met.  Phil Jackson would have “somewhat” met those expectations because he has won championships for the Lakers in the past.  But that still doesn’t guarantee a championship.

But LA wouldn’t be LA without those expectations.  The city simply expects the best.  Just look at the Lakers roster.  A roster filled with soo much talent they don’t even know what to do with themselves.  That talent seems to have gone to waste in the pre-season and nobody wants to see a talented team lose to the Golden State Warriors.  Laker’s star Kobe Bryant seems to be happy with the coaching change, “To be honest, I said D’Antoni was my first choice because I didn’t even know Phil was going to be an option,” Bryant said. “And then Jimmy’s the one that brought up Phil’s name. I didn’t even know that was a consideration. They said, ‘Well it is, and I want to know how you feel about it.’ I said ‘I love it’ and that was it. They knew my two guys that I liked. If one didn’t work out obviously with Phil, they knew that they had my approval to pull the trigger on the other one.”

Well of course Kobe has to say that.  Who wants to be labeled the team douche….oh wait….its Kobe.  He can do whatever the f*ck he wants, it’s clearly his team.  I am just glad Jim Buss consulted Kobe about the deal, that is a true friend right there.  Wish Phil could say the same.  That is going to be an awkward Thanksgiving at the Buss household.  Will Phil Jackson even be invited even though he has been shacking up with Jeannie Buss for years? Whose going to be sitting at the head of the table boys? Soo tense but probably soo entertaining.

But the more important question here is: What exactly is the Lakers’ vision for the Lakers?  Yes we all know winning is on the mind and forever will be in this town, but can’t we give enough time for a team to rebuild and grow?  I guess not.  With an aging team with no bench, there is no time.  Maybe Los Angeles just wants to go big or go home.  It’s not such a terrible mantra but it can get exhausting and just down right annoying.  I think all of LA just needs to take a chill pill and give this so-called “offensive genius” D’Antoni a chance.  Who is ready to riot? 

However, if D’Antoni doesn’t take the Lakers to at least the Conference Finals, Dwight Howard will opt out as a free agent and probably kiss the Lakers goodbye.  Unless D’Antoni impresses the pants off Dwight and the rest of team, possibly rejuvenating the bench with Space Jam’s Michael Jordan Water, then the town can start talking.  Another pressing factor is Kobe.  The Black Mamba be old.  Along with newly acquired Steve Nash, Kobe has a good two years left in those aging knees.  Two years starting from now.  Is that enough LA?


It is a bit naïve to fully support your city’s team and all the decisions management makes.   This is a democratic country, we ain’t shutting up.  It should be everybody’s job to question management especially when they are making contentious actions.  I don’t really agree with the Lakers’ decision to immediately fire and hire a coach (What are we the Yankees?) but I am going to support them because let’s be honest…support is all they need now from their fans.  An old and ailing Lakers need their fans’ consistent support to get through this difficult transition and hopefully start producing some winning results.  If you are the type of fan that just needs to see results NOW, go jump on the Clipper bandwagon.